Wednesday, 7 December 2011
Our Leaders' Dilemma
Left: Pooter Cockell pondering the way forward
It must be the festive season. Once again The Dame was summoned into the presence of the Leader to advise on a rather delicate matter. Sir Merrick asked her to be circumspect but The Dame felt readers could give some unbiased advice over his dilemma.
A few years back humble Merrick, as he then was, persuaded colleagues he was full time and needed an allowance to reflect the fact. They caved him and gave him his near £70,000 a year. This year, when he picked up another £53,000 pa from LGA insolent councillors(and not a few officers), pointed out that he was just 2 days a week at Hornton Street and should adjust his allowance to reflect it. At the very idea our Leader threw a hysterical teutonic tantrum.
Recently a few councillors began suggesting the time was ripe for Pooter to 'move on'- but here's the rub....Pooter has children at boarding school and needs to fund school fees etc.
His plan is to get a junior ministerial position in the Lords before moving on. Doing so will mean he can re-balance his income by keeping his LGA job and maintain- through double jobbing-the taxpayer funded lifestyle he has become accustomed to.
So how can we all persuade our Prime Minister to clad Pooter in ermine so he can maintain his £130,000 lifestyle?